Giving yourself a pep talk

I'll admit it, last week I didn't blog because I felt sad. I never want to blog and write something scary or unpleasant which means that I just wait until I'm back to my normal, cheerful self. When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I read some cancer blogs and I found them terrifying because ideas or words were written on them like: my end is coming, I'm losing hope, 5 year survival, terminal, non-responsive tumours and palliative. I wanted to go to the internet for hope and reassurance but it was hard to find and now, I want to help provide that to people who might seek it.That was a lengthy way of telling you that I'm back :). I had a pep talk with myself this weekend that went something like this:


Cailey,

Yes, we are scared but no one controls fate and however the amount of time that we have is the amount of time that we'll be enjoying ourselves. You know that life is unpredictable and that cancer is one of many dangers in our world. That's okay because right now, we're happy and we're mobile. Let's go for a bike ride because we can! We are also definitely going to buy those pajamas at 50% off because if we do end up having surgery we are going to look fabulous.

Love,
yourself

p.s. we're also starting to get some wrinkles, keep an eye on it.
p.p.s. people live and it could be us.

Now, ignoring the possibility that I have multiple personalities, I encourage you to be honest when you're fearful and to address it like you would if you were your best friend. That's what I do and why I think I have decent self-esteem (my spirit always told myself how cute she was). It's okay to be scared and then to decide that you're ready to be brave again. We all have off days but this is my life and I'm the boss. (I frequently ask myself who's the boss and the answer is always ME! I love it.)

Please enjoy these pictures from the Run for the Cure in Edmonton with my Vernon Barford family - I know that I sure did.