My autonomy

I can't pretend to understand what it's like to be ill when you're a teen or a parent but as a young adult there are some fun quirks. For example, my partner, Kill, has given me (unsolicited) advice on the healthfulness of my diet. People want me to survive so badly that it, occasionally, overrides the reality that I'm a functioning grown-up. Don't worry though because I nipped that in the bud every time and I choose to be a very healthy eater. Actually, if you ever want to talk about illness diets, I'd love to hear from you on the blog.

The flip side of that behavior is when I get deferred to and I'm asked to make decisions over other, more senior, people around me. I'll get asked what the group wants to do, how long we can do it or I'll have to option to do something solitary. I'm rarely bound by social chores anymore which is pretty awesome/weird.

I sometimes think that if I was in my 50's or 60's this second type of behavior wouldn't be weird because I would have earned it through my generous life. My body would be consistently aged instead of aged in sections: old back, hips, nails, eyelashes and young arms, legs, face, breasts (except for a pesky tumor but they still look fine). Luckily, I've never felt more wise (well, as wise as 20-somethings can be) or understanding of life. I now know that making a bed is nearly impossible for someone with an injured back, old/sick people get strangely cold or that you shouldn't be too angry at those slow drivers - fast speeds actually hurt their bodies!

 At the end of the day, I'm getting more clever and learning strange lessons that are at least 50-60 years early. I've been bald, had cankles and been bought orthopedic pillows. I know that strangers will tell me that I'm going to be okay and have shown me love. People are kind and luckily, I get to be the boss often enough.

What's your weirdest aging moment? Did it feel timely or out of place? Maybe aging always feel shocking?